It’s been a while since I’ve posted anything. I want to get back into the flow of sharing again so I think it makes sense to share a quick summary of where I am in life right now before I get into more detailed stuff.
I’ve been working full-time as a software developer in the corporate world for the last three years and I’ve been using that time to explore my interests. I’ve started a podcast, started an alcoholic drinks brand, started a business helping people with their time management, improved my piano playing skills and started composing music. It really does feel like the end of an era. I’ve transitioned into my mid-twenties, turning 24 on my last birthday in July, and it feels like something has changed. I feel like I’ve entered a new phase of life. I’m no longer the fresh faced graduate that was thrown into the real world during the pandemic. I’ve explored and experimented and I’ve learnt a lot about myself. I’m glad I gave myself the room to wander, to try things, fail and quit if I wanted to. But it does feel now like I’m at a pivotal point in my life. Whilst having the time to experiment is valuable and I’m grateful for it, I think to myself what is the end of experimentation if not to find something you actually want to commit to? And I think it’s easy to forget this and wander for longer than you have to. Experimentation can eventually turn into a fear of commitment. Like I said something has changed and it’s got me reflecting on what’s next.
I think this next phase of my life requires me to commit. To take the lessons I’ve learnt from my early twenties and pick things to commit to, even if it seems scary to “lock myself in”. I’ve realised there is a lot of growth that comes from committing to something through the ups and downs with a mindset of overcoming obstacles rather than giving up at the first sign of difficulty. I also really don’t want to be that person at 35 or 40 who feels like everything just slipped away from them because they could never commit to something for long enough to see it through and reap the benefits. I feel more confident now in who I am and what I want to pursue. I have this really real feeling that 24–25 is a really good time to find something to commit to for the long-haul. I see it as the life I want at 35 is being built now and it makes sense to start committing to things that will take me to that place in 10 years. The key things seem to be around career, business opportunities, skillsets, romantic partner. I envision the challenges going forward to be around avoiding the shiny new toys set out to distract me.
Ultimately I think the best things in life are the other side of long-term commitment. When you commit to something for an extended period of time there’s something you unlock that can’t be purchased. You see it in those that are happily married for a long period of time, those who have been working at their business for many years, those who have been practising and refining their craft over the years, nothing can replace the commitment, time and labour of love put into these things. Saying all of this and realising it myself over time has led me to this point of thinking about what I want to commit myself to. Thinking about what I owe to my 35 year old self and the person I want him to be, I want him to be a well refined musician, someone who is competent at what he does (using software to build things that are useful), someone who has built a business of value, someone who has made connections with people from all around the world and someone who has been a present and supportive partner. I do believe that these are more than realistic things to aspire towards over a ten year period.
I’m a work in progress and there are some things I’m currently struggling with. I find myself living in the future a lot which you may already be able to tell. It’s only when I look back at old photos that I realise just how special that time was even though all I saw was problems at the time. Speaking of which if anyone has any good advice for living in the present I would really appreciate it 😅. I’m also a serial planner and over-thinker and I’m learning that I need to get better at embracing the chaos rather than trying to carefully plan out every potential outcome.
Sharing like this does not come naturally to me and I’m generally quite a reserved person but I hope this provides context for everything that comes later. I also hope that if you resonate with anything I’ve said that it helps you feel a little less alone. I’ll be sharing more about the things I’m doing, thinking about and working on etc in my upcoming posts.
